Beaming diidhiti {Faern in the Works}

diidhiti is the Sanskrit word for inspiration, splendor, light, power, brightness, and devotion

Beaming diidhiti is an inspiration series hosted by Thais, Faern, and myself. We’ll be rotating blogs each Tuesday to talk about what inspires us to get on our mats and how yoga inspires our lives off the mat. You can find more info and the blog schedule here.

Today I’d love for you to welcome Faern of Faern in the Works! She is a phenomenal photographer, amazing artist, and a beautiful inspiration for those who want to follow their dreams. Today, she’s here to share how her yoga practice inspires her off the mat.

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When navigating the internal/external universe – which sometimes seem to flow against one another- a certain mode of self sufficiency is necessary for me to create. Now, I’m not talking paying the bills and remembering to eat- because I pass over  that kind of thing all the time. What I’m talking about is believing in the self- knowing that I am me and that is enough- that I am what I am. That there is always a fire inside- that I am in charge of- that I light up and I cool down- a fire that is being stoked by me, and me alone. Becoming/recognizing ME- that I can stand here and say, with a strait face (and maybe a tear in my eye), that I am proud to be me. I am proud to call myself an artist in a time when artists get the least respect and barely a nod from your everyday U.S. societal structure.

Getting on the yoga mat is akin to calling a meeting with the Self, the capital ‘S’, the head honcho- and saying “hey, what’s up? How can we move through this?” … Especially if you don’t have a seated meditation practice yet, like myself.

Most directly and currently my reasoning for getting on the mat in relation to self-sufficiency is self care. With all this “San Francisco” happening around me, the need for self care is pretty high. It’s really easy to get carried away here- in many ways- even with too many yoga asana classes, but I digress… As many of my regular readers know, last year my mom passed away, may she rest in peace. The few months before I spent time taking care of her with a couple other members of my family. But what you may not know is that in doing so I really started to become ill, I was not taking care of myself properly and started developing, what they thought to be at the time, a heart problem. My blood pressure was astronomical, I was walking around in a complete daze and started taking even less care, I was a mess on the inside, but from the outside I just looked like me. Nobody understood what was going on, how I was even walking around with blood pressure like that was a mystery to a couple doctors. I had, of course, completely stopped practicing yoga asana. Until one day one of the two or three people I was in constant contact with at the time called me up- now, she has worked with many many people with serious illness and has been a part of a lot of studies on cancer and yoga- so-  to say the least she knows her stuff and I am very lucky- anyhow- she heard the numbers and had one, immediate response “Shoulderstand- now- everyday- even if it’s all you do”-

And that was just the beginning to me healing my heart- as it’s a very short story about a very long, slow road that I’d like to cut shortright now- I’ll just say that what inspires me to get on my yoga mat and practice yoga asana is staying on the road to self sufficiency. I spent many months working on this issue and getting my health to where it is now (regulated blood pressure! & understood physical challenges!) and I have a long way to go- but I know, as long as I stay with my herbal remedies, stay on my mat continuing to do my shoulderstands and my backbends- all is well.

Faern is a mixed media artist, photographer and yoga practitioner in San Francisco. Visit her website, follow her on Twitter, or like her onFacebook.